Frustrating/Enlightening

It's interesting how you can be in a terrific mood yet very depressed at the same time. I had a fantastic night with a friend who gave me an amazing present: she took me to see the newest Cirque Du Soliel, Totem. I hadn't been to one in about 17 years, and this was just as fantastic as I remembered. A great night. Met some new people who were fabulous, then saw a great show. Couldn't have asked for a better evening. Thank you very much, Becky. You have no idea how much that meant to me. So I went to bed quite happy. And woke up quite happy, but it's funny how just seeing a couple of paragraphs written by someone you care about can upset even the greatest of moods. Reading about how lonely someone is when there is very obviously someone who has done everything he can to be with you and to give you a hand when you're overwhelmed is a slap in the face.

Why do I let myself get so frustrated? Maybe because I keep getting caught by surprise. I think everything is perfect, then find out that I apparently read the situation wrong, or I was actually right about the situation, saw the warning signs, but didn't think it would affect me. That makes sense, trust me, but I won't go into details. Either way, I'm left heart-broken. I can still think about last night(this whole week has been pretty great, actually) and smile, but oh man do I need something to punch. It's days like this that I wish I could be a jerk and not care, but it's not in my nature. Being caring is a terrific trait, but also one which causes a lot of pain.

But, as Tyrion Lannister says, as well as just about every other character from A Song of Ice and Fire, "words are wind." I'm not going to sit here and pine over someone who doesn't appreciate me or see me for who I really am. I'm worth more than that. Done and done. Ready for a nice relaxing weekend.